January 2012
54 posts
1 tag
Devon Banks though
1 tag
Discussing Arrested Development with actual people
Meredith: You know how there's like those psycho crazy Arrested Development fans
Me: Yeah... like me
Meredith: No no these guys are actually crazy like SO crazy
Me: Yeah... no yeah that's me
Meredith: Oh... so you know what I'm talking about
Me: ...yeah
1 tag
I can’t wait to get my wisdom teeth taken out because maybe then I can lose all the weight that I gained over break and also painkillers
A List of Things My Mom Loves More Than She Loves...
Super Mario Galaxy 2 for the Wii
Potato wedges from KFC
I’d go on but I think this list is sad enough already
I never should have gotten a tattoo because now the only thing I want is another one HELP
I’d love to stay and chat but I’d really rather be memorizing Edgar Allan Poe’s wikipedia article because why not
A thing that my brother actually said
Me: Are you sure?
Matt: Yeah, pretty sure... but if I'm wrong, I wouldn't be surprised.
2 tags
I fully believe that my worth as a person is determined by how long my hair is.
1 tag
I want to seduce Will Arnett.
– Me
Sometimes I purposely don’t dress weather-appropriate because I want the weather to change according to my clothes.
1 tag
Tina: Here chug this.
Me: What is it?
Tina: A loko.
Me: I can't chug a 4loko...
Tina: I can, see watch!
1 tag
Another one of my favorite things: blaming everything on Meg, especially when she’s not around to defend herself.
“Someone ate all the chocolate from the tub of Banana Split ice cream? FUCKING MEGAN!”
50 Cent did not disappoint. He ordered a grapefruit soda. The waiter brings him...
– Aziz Ansari on Letterman last night, explaining his spotting of 50 Cent at a restaurant in NYC (via bu-girls
)
Yeag its offuivciall….. Killim several bottles of wine at Em’s house is my new number #1 fave
1 tag
After we say the same exact thing...
Bella: Hahaha
Bella: Roommates for a reason!
Bella: Mostly cause they assigned us together
Bella: But kinda cause we're so alike!
1 tag
The one good thing about this New Year’s Eve… it was fucked up enough to continue in my long streak of Repressed Holidays